Dec 28, 2006

cat poop can turn me into a sex kitten

Ohhh, there's a parasite that makes men dumb and women slutty.......

and how do I get this parasite??? Uh, I wanted to be more attractive, but on second thought, no thanks.

Dec 22, 2006

its like ... ya know ... christmas ... or somethin ...

so you get more crap !

swedish/finnish (?) supergroup mervi vesala ... kind of a predecessor to that "you touch my tra-la-la" tune that came out about a year ago ... except the hair and dancing is oh so much better ... and it doesnt have that creepy guy tonguing the camera ... (link courtesy j to the o to the shhhhhhhhh)

jesus loves you more then you will ever know ... and he wants you to reciprocate ... by grabbin yer junk and thinkin bout Him poundin you like a cheap whore ...

here's a better blog then ours ... but hey ... at least its ours, right !? guys !?? ... hmm ... i think i should put out an APB for bogardus ...

garrulous broads's awesome word of the day for 12.22.06

Dec 21, 2006

oh come, all ye nerdy ...

so fox news is all in an uproar about the "war on christmas" being waged by liberals, jews, and nancy pelosi ... but what i dont understand is what all these swill-eatin pundits are really worried about ... lets face it, the "war on christmas" is/will be waged in the media world (which is the real world to most people sadly), and last i checked all yer badass characters are pullin for the baby jesus, born of the virgin santa ... at least i think thats how it goes ... eight years of ccd for nothin ... anyway, to give you an example, ive compiled this list ... there's yoda, optimus prime (though there are contradictions to this claim), cobra commander (but not the joes apparently), the mario bros (even bowser!?), he man (and she ra), tmnt, uh, the christmas creature, fat albert, the california raisins, garbage pail kid yul tied aka murray christmas, the uncanny x-men, the dc superheros (batman aint no jew), the muppets (though i suppose ms piggy COULD be holdin a copy of the quran there...), rainbow brite, my little pony, care bears

and if all THAT fails we still have this badass santa to save the day ...

and, allah forbid, that fails, we've been growing THIS truly disturbing santa in the labs ... its a mix of all yer basic evil creatures, with just an extra pinch of snow leopard ....

and besides all the bullshit 80s-pop-culture references ... our good friends bill o'reilly and that skinny blonde bitch forget that the true roots of christmas "culture" did include .... DAS KRAMPUS ... thats right, that loveable spawn of satan that was st nicholas's personal "go-to-demon" when the kids were behaving badly ... legend (born in the mountains of austria/germany) had it that st nick wouldnt pull the ol coal-in-the-shoes routine if you were bad, but instead dispatch DAS KRAMPUS on yer ass ... the krampus would then pull you either into hell or southern spain (swear, im not making this up) and beat you mercilessly with a switch ... my knowledge of this comes from a book i picked up at the MCA chicago a while back ... the book is basically a huge collection of late 19th century christmas cards from germany/austria featuring das krampus in a series of different scenes, all drawn by different artists, mostly austrian, but some german, and even some polish ... the cards feature the krampus beatin kids, stealing kids, making kids cry, and (again, i swear) as st nicks chauffeur in a very early turn of the century automobile ... of course, most of these cards have the perticular illustrations emblazed on the front with festive "merry christmas" wishes in script font above it ... ahhh ... ze germans ... and actually, from my observation, it seems that our western idea of what the devil looks like comes from these early illustrations of the krampus ... goat legs, hooved feet, goatee, lil horns and holding a switch or (sometimes) a pitchfork ... there ya go ... there's also a tradition in some of the rural areas of austria thats still practiced where people dress up like krampuses ... ? ... krampusi? ... krampussees ? ... well, a bunch of people dressed up like the dude, and chase kids down the main street and make em cry, THEN a bunch of guys dressed up like st nick come and give em candy n shit ... wheee !

here's some people way too into this shit ...


i only have ONE question for the terrorists ... WHY DO YOU HATE OUR FREEDOM CHRISTMAS?!?!

an early xmas gift

more video fun

i'll give it to someone special, mainly you ...

Dec 20, 2006

I am officially in love with Justin Timberlake.

Where is MY dick in a box?

no love ?

... chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp ...

thats the sound of crickets singing on this ghost of a blog ... hmm ... ghost of a blog is my new emo band ... anyway, this post is about all things unpleaseant, ugly or morbid ...


speakin of ghost towns, this is truly haunting ... and though the commentary takes on a borat-like cuteness ... (from the site) "Zoologists also brought two American Bisons, but idea to breed them didn't work out and bison male run away. I don't know, if he run from radiation or from his bride, but last time bison has been seen in Belorusia, he heading west and may be he just decided to return to America." ... it is some seriously sad shit ...

this is truly gross ... blood scarf and meat pillow !

dead swallows

get em up

joseph merrick

also !


Wed Night @ Piece
1927 W North Ave 10pm

63rd Annual Beet Canning Festival with

The Drastics!! w/ Fada Dougou

special guests.....



To Whom it may concern.......

the last mothafuckas who missed the fuckin dub show ended up face down in a fuckin box factory with some asshole named Maurice pourin Kero Syrup all over their fuckin heads!!!!! i won't tell you what happened after just get the fuck to the fuckin dub show already!!!!!

PS-if these fuckin posts offend you with the way I talk in my fuckin posts then don't fuckin read em already!!!!!

Dec 14, 2006

spread love ?

i know theyre jus tryin to spread the love ... but still somethin intrinsically creepy about this ...

wikipedia ... spreadin the love

have a remix of this thats alot harder ... nice chorus though ...

like if the designers of my litte pony designed the atari logo

i love everything about ubiquity records ... design-wise ...

more the same

aight im bored

Dec 13, 2006

Taking a Break

I've been gone for awhile, doing my thing, but I'm back now.


I wrote a previous post about a cnn article on a poll that says america still has a problem with racism. I lost that post, but it pretty much said: 1) big surprise you might get an advantage finding a job in Chicago with an Irish last name, 2) a large majority of white people are racist, and 3) completely ignores all other races other than whites and blacks. Not that saying racism isn't still a problem, but it's not really news. And I dunno about their "stealth racism" idea.


Homeless Orphans


Does anyone remember this movie? Part one.

Or this?

Scarlet Pimernel

Stuck in a Rut

That is all.

Dec 7, 2006

be thankful for what you got ...

cause i got a diamond in the back ...
sun roof top ...
digin the scene wit a gangsta lean ... oooohoooh ...

yeah, so i been busy, and i mean really busy ... this job and the drastics keep me goin like i just cant stop till i get enough ... currently been workin on recordin (or re-recording to be more specific) these soul tunes by a man named Ralph "Soul" Jackson ... he was suppose to come up last nite to record the tunes, but i guess his house caught on fire and then he left his ID at home (his flight left out of Atlanta, GA) ... he hails from and lives in a quaint little town called Phenix City, Alabama, which is pretty notorious, and at one time was dubbed "the wickedest city in the United States" ... rumor on the interwebs (or more accuratly from my friends) is that the police dragged the rivers every monday in Phenix City by city ordinance ... cause it was that likely there were some dead bodies floatin in there ... ahh ... alabama is for lovers ... and dead drug dealers ... i guess ...

i also redesigned the drastics site

dont sniff compressed air

video of alton ellis backed by french group ASPO ... pretty decent ... dude sounds good for 60 or however old he is ...

some crazy stuff in here ...

NEERRRRRRRRRRDSS!!!! (courtesy of the pimpernel)

are you tired of those scientologists always cuttin on xenu !? do you think his plan for mass planet-wide genocide by intoxicating people and sending them in boeing brand 747s to earth to be stacked in volcanos and blown up with hydrogen bombs wasn't so bad !!?? well, get on board!

oh, and theyre gonna put up one of those awful tasting blue raspberry candy canes in downtown chicago ...

this is really really questionable ... they requested to be the drastics myspace friend which is the only way i came across it ... they claim the tapes are educational ... i dont get it ... why would i buy a tape of crackheads when i see at least 6 on my way to work most days ... i mean, if they were givin any of the money to these guys i might consider it, but then again theyd probably jus go buy more crack ...

i cant ... even ... try ... one of the funniest things ive seen in a while ... and for reference thats the guy

and, chicago=hotdogs

Dec 6, 2006

Political Rant

I try to keep ideology out of my political rants on the Bluntest. I knock a lot of politicians, but corruption, stupidity, and a reckless disregard for human life goes beyond ideology. That being said: "Read this"

Ok, everyone read the article? Good. I've tried to think of appropriate songs to go with two of these quotes and I think it sheds some light on the ramifications of these differing opinions:

"The bottom line is that a family is made up of love and commitment." - All You Need is Love

"Love can't replace a mother and a father." - What's Love Got to Do With It?

The second is synonomous with domestic violence. The first, though quirky, was stable enough to stay in bed together for great lengths of time while still getting along. Most couples would probably kill each other. Which environment do you think a child would most likely develop best?

Dec 5, 2006


Sometimes I think to myself: Teaching is rough, maybe I should have stayed a chemist..... on second thought, ick. But interesting, no?

Mom, relax, it's just a bag of weed.

Dec 3, 2006

This might be cute . . .

if, ya know, women weren't stoned to death about it previously. But you want to say, "awww, he felt shy!". The third picture is kind of funny, considering its on cnn.

Dec 1, 2006

Coolest Grandma Ever

Bingo's a gateway drug

This ought to waste some time while you're at work

Apparently this is the hip new game from Japan. Like most things from Japan, I don't get it.

Some news

Ha, check out the guys download history

And He will use bananas to smite the unfaithful. Yeah, thats Mike Seaver on the right. I saw part of this on TV the other night. Starts with them saying that all sex is bad, homo or hetero. They then go on to talk about homosexual love is bad. Of course, as they're reading the two quotes in the Bible that deal with this and expound on all it's short sighted glory, they have fairly graphic (for public television) images of hot man on man love. It really looks like they spent a little too much time doing research at the pride parade. If you want to learn more about this interesting outlook.