I might be going to hell

but I'm taking you all with me

Will Smith

Apparently Will Smith said some stuff about Hitler. Notice in the article the Red Eye/Chicago Tribune quotes the Jewish Defense League. Yeah, the JDL is a terrorist organization, probably not a group the Trib wants to be quoting. You might remeber the group from a previous post.

youtube gallery show

crap! i've been busy, so sorry for the lack of posts ... makin all my xmas presents n cards n things .... plus the holidaze parties and what not ... so here's some shizz thats been in my eyeballs for a while ... i don't think its too fresh ... but incase you missed it ...

with yo triflin' ass ... MILTON! ... r kelly. real talk. yeah, i hate this guy for f'real. the fact he comes from chicago just exacerbates the hate, as he reps my hometown ... and he's in some big trouble again for missing some court case cause his tour bus got pulled over in utah and the driver hadn't been logging his hours, and theres all these laws that commercial drivers can only drive up to x amount of hours a day (i don't know what the number is) so, yeah ... real talk.

we don't go to the mall, we don't go out to eat ... snoop dogg's "sensual seduction" ... my vote for video of the year, clip is both hilarious and badass ... the winning combo in my book

who doesn't like seein' drunk hicks on lawnmowers gettin pulled over and pepper sprayed ? well, if it's you, don't click that link

my man archo89 has about 90 original iron chef episodes online ... seriously, archo89 is some kind of god ...

as for the holidays, i plan on gettin, but not limited too ...

chuckfaced
hamperjacked
hooptywrecked
jimmychucked
crowfaced
horseliptied
colliemoufed
screwlipped

et al

Worst news story ever

Why this was linked on cnn.com's home page headlines? I don't know.

*** Editor's Note: This story is not the original story. The original story which was posted was about the beaver being "sentenced to death."

Bogardus: Artist

He always felt like an artist, but he couldn't draw

Bogarus' own personal John Baptiste Philouza

And the reference from above

the legend of the legend of legend

so, like all city-dwelling rubes, i am susceptible to viral and mass marketing done by corporations that have more money then most small countries ... the one that has been on-going-ly been making me wonder "just what IS that about" is "i am legend" ... obviously, it wasn't nagging me to the point of actually doing something, as it's the day of the opening (in chicago) and i only knew THAT cause NPR did a little review of it ... but i did do a lil research, and here's what i learned ...

1. its a book from 1954 orginally called "the last man on earth"
2. this is the 4th movie version of the book, the first version being an italian production starring vincent price
3. another version from the 70s called "the omega man" starred charlton heston

i don't know what the full plot of the new movie is, but the original book version sounds pretty happening ... not only is the premise of the book a sort of psychoanalyzes (obviously projected) of someone going mad from loneliness, but contains a twist i think is really clever ... spoiler warning (for the original which doesn't follow the will smith version) ... coming up on the next line ...

so basically the protagonist robert neville is the only person fully immune to a virus that has killed or transformed everyone on earth ... the people transformed are more or less vampire/zombies ... however, unbeknown to neville, some of the transformed are still "living" and are not "crazy go-for-broke" movie vampire/zombies ... since these "living" vampire/zombies retain the qualities of the crazy vampire/zombies neville cannot distinguish between the two kinds and thusly never even hypothesizes that there is a difference ... so each day neville goes around killing sleeping vampire/zombies, "living" or "dead" ... the "living" vampire/zombies finally get tired of being killed in their sleep, and dispatch a young girl (ruth) to neville who takes her in (as a prisoner at first) but the two eventually form sort of relationship, presumably based on neville's incredible loneliness and his hope of curing the world of this virus ... neville runs tests on her, and upon learning that she is not "carrying" the virus is abruptly knocked out (by ruth) allowing her escape ... neville continues in his daily routine of killing vampire/zombies until they attack his home in full force, not killing him, but taking him captive to be executed in a public display in front of the entire society of vampire/zombies ... for you see, he had become the freak, the dracula, the "legend" of evil in the day (originally night) ...

and



and this is insanely accurate, i recommend you try it, it nailed mine ...

Monkeys in the News

I love me a good monkey story.

Roaming, thieving monkeys sought in roundup

So I read that article and tried to leave a comment on it on cnn's page. I don't think they'll let me post it. But if you see a comment by McDangle from Murfreesboro, then you'll know the Scarlet Pimpernel has struck again! Because I don't think they'll post it, I'll just post it here:

"'The city is filled with tales of people having to beat off a crazed monkey with a broom on their porch.' Last time I was beating a monkey off on my porch, the neighbors threatened to call the cops."

Yeah, I'm clever with the masturbation puns.

lookin' ball show : volume 7

DEAD DOG(?) WITH WIG/CHOICE OF A NEW GENERATION/MORE SWEET FACIAL HAIR BUT HE'S NOT ALL FUN N GAMES/METAL/THIS GUY KICKED SO MUCH ASS HE HAS A MUSTACHE STYLE NAMED AFTER HIM/BABIES/JESUS, METAPHORICALLY/QUALITY/THE CLOWN'S GOT BIRD FLU

WGN Morning News

I love WGN morning news. One of the doods, the two time Silver Dome Award winning Larry Potash, kind of does a fun "see what I found on the internet" type thing. Yeah, it's a lot like what we do here at the Bluntest, but we don't get paid. (Driznastic, get us some sponsors!) And also, we like to try to keep it a little classier here. Seriously.

Sure, we had 2 posts in the past week that were a little racy. I'd link you to them, but I'm lazy. Just scroll down to Driznastic's "Girly Show" and my "Primaries." Not terribly racy, just some hot cartoons and some hot politician's wives. So Larry. O've seen his segment a couple times including: The Hooter's girls, this morning's segment on Pillow Fighting Championship (yeah, it's a sexy naught, sometimes naked event, nsfw-ish), and a buy a date online escort site that he found. To be honest, I think the escort site was a result of him not having anything to present that day, he did a last minute search, found that, got about halfway through and realized it was prostitution, then quickly turned off the screen.

Holiday Season Safety

It's that time of year again, so I want all of you out there to have a happy and safe Holiday Season. That means if you're a 9 year old boy, stay away from parade floats.

Poor kid. And apparently, "parade watchers shouted at the driver to back up, but the pickup truck pulling the Greater Heights Family Worship Center float ran over Jordan a second time." And that has to suck.

But seriously, how often can 9 year old boys be run over by Christmas floats? (If you said about once a year, you're right!)

Maybe in a couple years, this kid can continue the tradition

And if you're going to get a DUI, do it in style!

CORN SHUCKIN n BUSKIN in MADISON with THE DRASTICS - TONITE!

ATTENTION
TONITE
ANNUAL CORN SHUCK n BUSK
WITH SPECIAL GUESTS
THE DRASTICS
AT
THE ANNEX, MADISON WI
9pm, 21+

This was a signal for a big time. Now just sitting down to a big pile of corn and shucking it out is work. That is, if a feller had to do it alone. But when it meant seeing your best girl, that was different. That's when work went out and play came in. Nobody knows who first thought up a corn-huskin' on a boy-girl basis, but he was a smart man. He was wise enough to know that if he wanted a crowd big enough to do the job he would have to have some other attraction than merely a group of countrymen sitting around a pile of corn and working away until midnight. So, the corn shuckin' became a social event.

Primaries are A' Comin'!

I think we've been a little devoid of political talk regarding the upcoming Presidential primaries. So, in order of importance:

Kucinich has got himself a hottie hippy with a tongue piercing, and, yes, she's about a foot taller than he is. And she doesn't eat meat. Quit your snickering.

And Fred Thompson's daughter is pretty hot, too! (What's that? That's his wife? She must really like Law and Order)

(On a side note, this is Salman Rushdie's wife. Pretty hot, kind of looks like the foreign student from American Pie)

From Russia with love, here's Gorbachev's granddaughter! Best thing to come from the communist bloc since vodka.

Oh yeah, the primaries.

Ron Paul supporters at least have a kick ass RV. Take that Straight Talk Express! And what have we learned from this? Old people have a lot in common. Mainly RVs and conservativism.

That's all for now, with so many candidates out there it's hard to cover them all in just one post. Oh, and if you want some more information other than who has the hotter wife or who's supporters ride in the cooler van, click here. Who'd have thought that as many Republican candidates oppose the death penalty as Democrats? Perhaps more on that later.

TONITE at REGGIES in CHICAGO

TONITE!
at
REGGIES'S ROCK CLUB
Chicago, Ill.
21st and State

THE DRASTICS
FAMOUS DUB REVIEW and PORCELAIN TEETH!
COME CELEBRATE THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE REPEALMENT OF OUR NATIONS PROHIBITIONARY STATUS

The Subscribers respectfully inform the Public, and the Citizens of Chicago and Cook County in particular, that they have established a Show for the purpose of entertaining the populace between the aforsaid places, and also for the convienance of consumption of libation and dance ... It will begin at Reggie's Rock Club in Chicago on the eve of Wednesday the 5th of December in the year of our lord 2007.

Patrons may rest assured, that this establishment will be much more enjoyable than any heretofore established within the Town; having of the finest songs, and a propensity towards merriment.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 5, '07,
Citizens, prove yourself worthy of the 21st Century,
HUZZAH FOR THE DRASTICS!

girly show!

nic klein has ill illustrations ... like this one ...


if you are uninitiated to the phenomenon that is 2girls1cup consider yourself lucky ... and do yourself a favor, do not google it or attempt to find it any other manner ... if you are familiar though, you might be interested in this review of the film ... even if its a fake, its still pretty good ...


and now back to chicks to being hot ... every playboy centerfold ... pretty well put together website ... we'll see how long it stays up (well, no, i'm not gonna keep that close tabs on it) ... but of course the one i'm most interested in (bettie page) is busted ... this is obviously nsfw, right ?

back to scary broads Jocelyn Wildenstein ... watch her transform ... and to think, MJ thought he invented this kinda thing ... more on her

... but i will f*ck a bird up ...

The eating of the ortolan has ethical eating groups baying for blood. First, it is caught with a net in the forest. Taken alive, its eyes are poked out and the bird is put in a small cage. It's then force-fed oats, millet and figs until it has swollen to four times its normal size. Then the bird is drowned alive in fine cognac. Then, it's roasted whole, in an oven at high heat, for six to eight minutes. Once it reaches the table, a napkin is placed over the eater's head. The technique of eating the ortolan is to put the whole bird into the mouth, with only the beak protruding. Here sadism mingles with masochism. The first taste as you crunch on the bird is the brandied flesh and fat. Then, the bitterness of the guts follow and finally, as the tiny, delicate bones are being chewed on, they will lacerate the diner's gums, with the salty taste of the bleeding gums mingling with the richness of the fat and the bitterness of the organs. Chewing the ortolan takes approximately 15 minutes.

more

....... delicious

how can you not love this guy !?

christmas is coming soon

content !? you want content !? we simply accumulate and disseminate here ...